Like "The first draft of anything is shit."
"Forget your personal tragedy. We are all bitched from the start and especially have to be hurt like hell before you can write seriously. But when you get the damned hurt, use it--don't cheat with it."
"Write hard and clear about what hurts."
"The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting you are special too."
All Ernest Hemingway, of course.
On Sunday I took care of a patient who broke my heart. Anyone child who is dying and knows he is dying has a certain look. It's common in the adult world, but in pediatrics they so rarely give up. And to see them resign themselves and to know what is coming, man is it fucking hard. Not so much for me so much as it is for the teenager alone doing it. It breaks my damn heart really and truly.
So I guess it was there after all;) Fully capable of repairing itself, mending anew only to break all over again. What a portrait we paint, eh?
I wish you would call. I know you won't, but I wish you would. The tequila brings out the wishes. Humans aren't like cats, another Hemingway gem. We hide our emotions. We drink them away. Until we shoot ourselves in the head with them.
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