When I drink, I get lonely. I get lost in memories of you in this apartment. 

I call and you don’t answer. 

I’ll be so angry with myself tomorrow. But tonight I only want you. Your curls. Your blue eyes. Your laugh. Your fierce hug. The absence of you smacks. 

What I wouldn’t give to be with you in Muir or Sanibel or any of my favorite places of the universe. To share them with you. How I miss you when my defenses are no more.